Day Nine

I'm back home. I tried escaping from reality but I know I cant hide from it and I can't lie to myself anymore that you are gone. It is not like you are dead but close to it, you will no longer be the one I called up once things got messed up at my end, you won't be the one I would confide in whenever my minds are troubled. You will no longer be the one for my everything simply because of you no longer wanted to be the one anymore.

I struggled today and cried a little. However, I only allowed myself to be upset about you for an hour which I succeeded in doing it. I saw your best friend online and he tried talking to me about us. How wrong at the very first place we were together, how I hurt you in the past and how you felt so hopeless about me being the one for you. It is a little bit late to realize about them but it is good. I can't manage to get the answers from you but through him, I have understood. It is just that I can never ever imagine you can leave me just like that. I will not be passing blames anymore or at least, I will try.