Saturday, January 07, 2012

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Never have I expect that the truth behind the lies can be so brutally painful. My hands trembled, I was shivering and immediately broke down in tears and out of speech when I logged into myRichard’s facebook account and read the conversation he had with his staff, ARA. I felt like a complete fool to them. I felt betrayed and chuck in fears.

I brave myself to confront to myRichard, all I got is a crappy explanation where he claimed there is no physical contact but just flirtatious form of conversation. Isn’t that enough to made severe damage to our relationship? No physical contact does not mean you can still go and flirt around verbally, that certainly does not mean you are right.
You have no rights to hurt me like this. I don’t deserve all these.

Paco Cho,

What am I to you? Why the hell must you tear my heart apart? How can both of you be so fake to me and covered up with so much of lies? I really really felt like a fool to you. And not a girlfriend. Not at all. I am expecting you to treat me right, to protect me and to love me with all of your heart and not cutting me deep now by betraying me and lying to me.

You have not slept her yet…but FLIRTING with her is WRONG. IS SO DAMN WRONG. I tried to give my best to you, and I love you so much that I can be god-damn sure you can never find someone else loving you the way like I do now. I put you ahead of my everything but what did I get in return? A heart wrenching truth behind all the lies. How can you be so brutal to me…what did I done wrong?

Stop asking me to forget what had happened, to erase what I just read from your conversation with her…If I managed to do so, I wouldn’t even crying at this second I am blogging this out…I don’t know how to heal myself. I do not know what to do.
I am not strong enough to fight this alone. I am not feeling alright……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….