They are gone and will they ever return? Sigh...

An impulse to quit blogging has triggered me. I think it’s most prolly those frustrations and hurt I went through lately that have caused this. I want happy posts. I want them as beautiful memories that would never fade in my life, that’s why I keep them in my blog with my writings. I know life has ups and also downs, it could not be well balanced or be perfect all the time but if I am able to make a solid decision, I definitely would opt to be happily being in single life than worrying so much having a boyfriend that would do things that hurt me. But love doesn’t come in sanity. It’s in a package that changes are prohibited.

If people are to realize, all the blog entries are mainly about relationships. It’s about him, him and him and him only. Hahaha. So I find it pointless now to keep up my blog if I am only left with disappointment than contentment. However, on a second thought, I also ponder upon how I could release all those tangled emotions if I were to quit writing out my feelings at my own space. I hardly got loving parents or caring siblings that I could turn myself into or confide in. My family can only be best described as complicated. In fact, I wish they would bother me less.

I guess the closest person to me would be my bf. Looking at how things ended up lately, I can’t be sure of he’s the one I should trust in completely anymore. It’s pathetic, I know. I’m missing those gone moments where I used to trust without doubts. Will they ever return back to me? I just hate what I am feeling now. I can’t define happiness with a clear headed mind anymore. Life sucks. I have finally see him differently, not like I used to and it's sad.