Selfish-love

Someone just passed the news yesterday that one of myRichard’s friend has passed away. A girl. Prolly only aged 25. That’s pretty young. She only lived a quarter of a lifespan of a hundred years. Well, I remembered meeting her for a few times at the same club, Oval, and the most recent one was like 2 months back at Alan’s house during cny. She was on drugs and her skeleton-like body sometimes scared me. I am so afraid if I shake her hand a little too hard, I might have the possibility breaking off her whole arm. But the point is she’s gone. I am not even close to her at all but I felt so restless about the news. It triggered me for a while that life is short. It is too short for all the wrongdoings and regrets. If she were to live healthier, stay away from those harmful threats of drugs and try eating more, I think her lifespan shouldn’t be this short. I am sure her family and close friends having a hard time digesting the news but they just have to deal with it strongly. RIP, Stephanie!!! *May you found your peace up there!*

I remembered losing a friend few years back. He was also around 20 plus when he suddenly fainted and went into coma and died. It was merely 24 hours and he was gone. Just like that. I couldn’t agree more that life is so fragile that you do not know what you are missing till it’s gone. That’s why I do not hold back in confessing my love to myRichard every single day.

Sometimes, I do impractically question myself, if I am gone one day, how is it going to be for myRichard to adapt to my gone ness. It is so sudden that maybe I wouldn’t even has a chance to say goodbye. And what if…it is another way around? We have built our lives so much among ourselves that we don’t seem wanted to grow apart. I hope we will have the chance of growing old together and still be as loving as ever and God is not allowed to take him away from me. Unless, I died first. :P